I'm sad to report that the last Sabbath I had was a bit odd. I guess I looked around and didn't find the right groove at the church I normally attend. It's filled with nice people. Unfortunately, I know very few of them well enough to walk up to them and strike a conversation even after three years of attending the same church.
The rest of the Sabbath was spent reading the bible and staying out of the hot Florida sun. At least I got to hear a new song in church and was able to let that wonderful melody & lyric carry me through to this very moment. I think, for me at least, music and hymns have always been what my church experience has always been about. Each hymn is both praise as well as a melodic prayer. What could be better than that?
I respect your goal of "dying to self". I too pray that, though not in those exact words. Dying of anykind gives me the willies. I prefer to ask God to empty me of self and of all else. I guess it's the same thing without using the "d" word. I want to live for Christ. I want to be like him and less and less like myself. That doesn't sound exactly right either. How could I not be myself? I think God wants us to draw closer to him, but still retain our personality. Otherwise, we'd all be the same in heaven and heaven would not be such an interesting place.
I pray that you enjoy what's left of this week and that you have the very best Sabbath this time around that you've ever had.
Yours in Christ, Raul
[exceprt from a letter to a friend]